Posted by: Skeptical Moose | June 6, 2011

L’esprit de l’escalier, OR, What I should have said was …

It’s late and it’s dark, and I should be sleeping
But rest I can not, for my mind is creeping

And whilst I don’t fret, and happily ‘chillax’
The witty dinner table response is … perhaps

Often not something I’m able to say
Maybe it’s not ‘good dinner table etiquette’, or it might be my esprit de l’escalier

The lack of cutting riposte is simply not fair
Rarely at the table, but so often at the stairs

How is it that one is unable to cope?
My opponent reads a tabloid horoscope

And yet I fail to question his beliefs
As his quotes yet again … from Gillian McKeith

“Oh no no, I wouldn’t want to bore ya
Tell me more about this Derek Acorah”

Thus you find me here, with ample time
To conjecture some objections, and, somewhat self-indulgently … well, it is the Pod delusion … put them all in rhyme

A few basics …

1 I don’t need a God and neither do you, 2

The removal of a supernatural being on which so many rely could only help humanity, 3

Politicians and businessmen make careers and money out of war, 4

Learn about evolution and you’ll realise how lucky you are to be alive, 5

And even luckier to be sat somewhere warm, well fed, listening to and understanding this, 6

When it all ends we become the earth once more – our impersonal and interchangeable atoms of awareness and discovery make a final transition back into the world that spawned us. That’s Amazing with a capital A. Why on Earth do we need a construction called ‘heaven’?, 7

Everyone means something different when they say the word ‘fate’, 8

It isn’t cheesy – it’s factual – when one says: ‘what’s mine is yours, what’s yours is mine’, 9

If we don’t re-think ‘boom and bust’ capitalism RIGHT NOW, it will all happen again, 10

The majesty of science is that everything we hold to be true can be altered, under accepted experimental conditions, in a moment; such as the once denied, then disputed, then accepted fact that the Earth moves around the Sun.
And on that topic, I return you to 1

You see, what we’re dealing with here isn’t heresy, or jealousy, or treason
It’s science, self-reliance … reason

I don’t want Bible-freaks or dagger-wearing Sikhs, but truth
No ghetto-loving Jews, or post-modern Druze … but proof

After all, what do you call ‘alternative medicine’ that actually works?

Just look at this Big Society we’ve managed to create
Where Big Brother Live replaces reasoned debate

And what a bizarre human state
That’s it rare to love, and more common to hate

Is this our future? Vacuous consumerisation
Says I, born ‘79, child of the MTV generation

You see, the point of life is to shop and to buy
One naturally assumes till you drop and you die
And if you refuse, and throw a strop and you cry
It’s called over the top and all wonder why

But why oh why am I telling you this?
I had my chance; an opportunity missed

His irrational ramblings I had to ignore
Alex, please leave your scepticism at the door

Frustration vented, it’s time for bed
All of the above, is what I should have said


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